What Rhymes With Sabbatical?

Unbelievably, we have almost reached the three week mark. Tomorrow night the Tornadoes will be coming home.

To say that this separation has resembled an out-of-body experience would not be stretching the truth. I can't even put an adjective to it. Not joyful. Not mournful. Just very, very different.

Obviously I have been extremely lax and neglectful here in the blogosphere - not only neglecting to post but also not so much in the "reading other people's blogs" department. I'm all "Hey, come read my new column!" and then I vanish. Not nice, I know. I'm sorry. I am here to make amends.

Seriously, I fully expected to bore you to death with my nonstop wailing about how I have relinquished my own identity to parenthood, how I don't know who I am or what to do with the husk of myself that got left behind when they boarded that early morning flight. Turns out? The old girl's got a little life in her still.

Since I have not bothered to write about what I've been doing these past three weeks, I thought I'd do a recap of sorts. We'll call it "What I Have Learned":

1. It is possible to survive quite a long time on a box of Triscuits and a tub of Wispride sharp cheddar.
2. I love me a Mango Tangarita or two. (Okay, three.)
3. Loved them the next night, too.
4. Running three miles before work is less fun when you drink three Mango Tangaritas the night before.
5. Workdays without personal junk crammed into them are a lot of work, man.
6. That Denise Richards is one messed up chick.
7. But considerably less messed up than the Two Coreys.
8. If you - meaning me - get it into your head that you can still handle a hot nightclub in a major city on a Saturday night? Full of barely clothed twenty-one year olds drinking Red Bull and vodka? ...Yeah, can does not mean should.
9. The little square hand basket at Sephora does not make a good iced coffee holder. And they don't like it when you use all the free tissues to mop up your mess.
10. I guess I can go out for margaritas on a Wednesday night...again...
11. Seriously, out? Again?

Which brings me to the here and now - the Saturday morning that I spent reading in bed, the trips to Target and Hannaford to restock for the Tornadoes' return and subsequent camp lunch packing, and now the afternoon to catch up with the blogosphere. Not a Mango Tangarita in sight.